It's not a cry you can hear at night, it's not somebody who's seen the light...

There's a man at the cafe downstairs who has a rather unique accent. He's incredibly cheerful and always friendly, but most of the time I can't understand him and that makes me really nervous. Social situations, you know... He's from an Eastern European country...you know, previously part of the USSR but not Russia. I do not know which part and if he told me I think I would have a hard time understanding what he meant, which makes me feel bad because he's so lovely!

Anyway, apparently last week Joanne asked for a coke and he asked, in his loud and jolly voice, "DO YOU WANT A BIG COCK OR A SMALL COCK?!" because apparently in his accent Coke=cock. Now I wasn't there last week, and I had never experienced this because I drink Pepsi.

Until today.

Me: "I'd like a Pepsi Max, please."

He wandered away to search the fridge and he came back. "No Pepsi. 'sall gone! You want a cock!? 'snice cock! You know you want a cock!"

Me: ".... nothanks"

Turns out there was Pepsi Max anyway, he was just looking in the wrong fridge. Still, the entire cafe heard this and died laughing. Me? I just died.

EDIT: And a student just sent in an email that said

"Dear Lisa,

sorry for my stupid."

AWESOME.